just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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