David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
