Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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