12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
