It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
there was a trapeze. enough said
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
