soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
