was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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