i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
