You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I'm at about main and main street
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Randomize
