do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize