Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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