At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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