Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
