suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
false alarm, still single
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
