I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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