I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
