just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize
