I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
