I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Randomize