New invention idea: vibrating tampons
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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