Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
