Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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