Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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