I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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