i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
