Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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