She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
