Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
