Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
