I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
After last night, I could never be a politician.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
