I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I have tasted many bathrooms
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize