do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
