I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
no you cant smoke seaweed
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
