Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize