when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
