the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize