Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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