you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
