Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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