Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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