I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize
