wat bout pragnant strippers??
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
