Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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