I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
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