soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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