Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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