their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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