Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize