He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Randomize