yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
