The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
