he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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